" " " A to Z with Meryl and Me: Post Partum

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Post Partum

A couple of days have gone by.  The baby came out healthy and thriving and now, well, now I have just a touch of post partum depression.  No more kicking inside or feeling as though it is the very essence of me.  I actually woke up around 5:30 AM so sleep has not yet come back into my life and what was my dream?  I was in a grocery store with my old math teacher, Mrs. Beebe.  I didn't want to be there although I was hungry.  I don't like grocery shopping. I was waiting for her to fill her cart.  She mentioned living nearby and the rent only being a little over $300 per month.  She also said the house was empty and sounded sad about that but was buying groceries for guests.  I remember feeling lost and feeling sorry for her loneliness.  I wanted to leave. I wasn't really doing anything.  And why Mrs.Beebe?  I don't know! 

Yesterday I spoke with Terri my webmaster and we decided I need to have a three pronged attack.

1.  Convert blog into a book.  That would take edits, research on publishing and who knows what else.
2.  MARKET A to Z which means pursue agents, casting directors  and filmmakers.
3.  Create new project, the one that actually pays me and everyone involved.

Obviously these all have the potential to be gargantuan tasks so one will reveal itself as the most important and I will proceed with that first.  One thing I know is although I have other paying work looming I'm not looking forward to any of it because it's not acting on camera.  To be so clear in knowing what I want to do for my living is a gift.  I wish that for everyone.  Now I just have to ignore all the people who think my wish should be something else because of the money or because of their own worries.  Must move on, forge ahead and figure out my next move.

Oh and no word from Meryl Streep.  I know she's in England shooting the story of Margaret Thatcher, Iron Lady, but one would think she would have the decency ;-)  Actually, I don't think she has seen one letter and I know she hasn't read a single word.  So, unless one of her friends stumbles upon me, to oblivion is where I will fly.  That's OK.  Ultimately, it's far more important for filmmakers to see me than Meryl Streep herself.  So I better get to work on that.

4 comments:

Terri said...

You should ask Kelly, dr. dream, about your dream

Nancy T said...

I was thinking the exact same thing! I have to copy, paste and send it to her.

Tendral Diaries said...

Nancy!!! first of all...your next project needs to be your movie about the making of A-Z...that's how you will met Meryl! I see it so clearly.

btw, Mrs. Bebe represents your shadow...the part of you who is sad and lives an un-passionate life (filled with math...eww)...completely opposite of everything you stand for...she is totally pragmatic (the part of you that cares about shopping, and feeding you when you are hungry...a real meat and potato's type).
But, as it is with all shadows, you must Face 'em, Embrace 'em, Ace 'em, and Replace 'em)--That's my formula for dealing with FEARs that lurk in our shadows. We can talk more about this on the D-Spot next Monday.

Kelly Sullivan Walden said...

bizarre...Tendral Diaries is (was me) in a prior incarnation...it's kelly, doctor dream :)